Birds Of A Feather Episode 37
Alfie barked as someone banged their fist hard on the door of Jess’s cottage.
Whoever it was out there sounded impatient and very angry.
Jess held on to Alfie’s collar as she opened the door.
“Shauna!” she exclaimed. “What on earth . . .?”
“Can I come in?” It was more a demand than a request. “What I’ve got to say to you won’t take long.”
Alfie gave a low growl. Jess let go of his collar and put her hand on his head to reassure him.
“It’s OK, boy,” she said, then stepped back to let Shauna in.
“What’s wrong?” she asked anxiously. “Is it Frank? Or Maureen?”
“Neither.” It was obvious Shauna was having difficulty controlling her temper.
“It’s not them. It’s you.
“How dare you tell Dad who you are! Have you any idea how upset he is?
“He’s not speaking to me and Ma wants to know what it’s all about. She knows something is wrong.”
“I’m sorry,” Jess apologised. “I didn’t mean to cause all these problems.”
“Well, you have. You’ve brought nothing but trouble to this family. Just like your mother did.
“And now, because of you, they’re moving on,” Shauna hissed. “At a time when I really need them.
“I’ve not been well. Eddie’s useless and I don’t know how I’m going to manage without Ma’s help.
“It’s all your fault!”
Jess was about to apologise again when something inside her snapped.
“Now, just you hang on a minute,” she said so fiercely that Shauna took a step back.
“Before you come into my house and start accusing me of bringing trouble to your family, you did that all on your own.”
“How do you make that out?” Shauna glared at her, but Jess wouldn’t be intimidated.
“When I came to your house the other day, you recognised me.
“You knew I’d survived the accident that killed Joe and Kathryn and you made no attempt to tell your parents about me.
“Do you have any idea what growing up in children’s homes was like?”
For the first time, Shauna didn’t look so sure of herself.
“Well, I couldn’t have taken you,” she muttered.
“Me and Eddie had only just got married and were living in a poky one-bed flat.
“Besides,” she added, looking around Jess’s comfortable sitting-room, “you haven’t done so badly for yourself. This place is a whole lot nicer than mine.”
“It belonged to my grandfather. My other grandfather whom I never met.”
“So he was no better than me, was he?” Shauna bristled, on the attack again.
“Why didn’t they take you in? They could have provided for you more than I could.”
“According to a letter my grandfather left for me, they fell out with my mother when she married Joe.
“They weren’t any happier about the marriage than your family was.
“So Kathryn, who was headstrong –”
“You can say that again,” Shauna said with a toss of her head.
Jess ignored her.
“Kathryn was furious with them and cut them out of her life completely. She didn’t tell them when I was born.
“Jock didn’t see the news reports about this baby who survived the car crash that killed her parents.
“But you must have seen it, Shauna. You must have known that nobody claimed me.”
Shauna flushed and looked down at her feet.
“I reckon I did. But I was expecting our first and wasn’t thinking straight.”
“Frank told me he and Maureen were travelling in Europe at the time and didn’t know Joe and Kathryn had died until they came back, several months later.
“Why didn’t you tell them when they came back?” Jess continued. “It might have helped them come to terms with Joe’s death.”
Shauna sighed as she picked at her fingernail.
“I had the job of telling them about the accident, and Ma was that upset by the news that she had a heart attack. I felt awful about it.
“When she came round, I didn’t want to risk upsetting her again in case it brought on another, so I put it off, promising myself I’d tell them when she was stronger.
“Only the longer I put it off, the harder it became.” Shauna looked at Jess and, for the first time since they’d met, there was no hostility in her eyes.
“I’m sorry for what you went through, Jess. And that’s the truth. I honestly thought you’d be OK.”
Jess’s heart went out to her.
“It’s OK. I understand. You were in a pretty awful situation.”
“I was just trying to protect Ma. You’d have done the same.”
“Who knows?” Jess shrugged. “I never knew my mother. Or my father. I’d hoped . . .”
She was about to say she’d hoped to have found out more about them now she’d found Joe’s family, but she knew there was no point.
“Yeah, well.” Shauna’s voice was gruff as she stood up to go. “Sorry I was a bit full on. To be honest, I was a bit scared of what you’d say.”
“I’m glad you came.” To her surprise, Jess found she meant it. “It’s cleared the air. And what’s done is done.”
“Dad told me you promised not to get in touch with Ma,” Shauna said as Jess opened the front door for her.
“I did,” Jess said heavily.
Shauna gave her a brief smile.
“Thank you. I appreciate it. I realise this can’t be easy for you. But this isn’t the right time to tell Ma.”
As Jess watched Shauna walk to her car, she wanted to run after her and ask her if maybe they could meet up some time.
But she knew what the answer would be, so she went back inside and closed the door.