Birds Of A Feather Episode 36
In the kitchen of Moor View farmhouse, the smell of furniture polish and the scent from daffodils on the oak dresser mingled with the rich aroma of slow-cooked lamb.
Paloma was humming quietly to herself as she gave the casserole a final stir. She’d made it with red wine, garlic and mint and she hoped Will would like it.
She’d already given Finn his tea and he was in the sitting-room watching television.
The cat was curled up asleep in the chair by the Aga, the wind was moaning through the branches of the beech trees at the bottom of the garden and the farmhouse kitchen was warm and cosy.
Paloma felt a surge of contentment as she put the lid on the casserole and returned it to the lower oven.
It would all have been perfect but for the worry she had about how to tell Will what Finn had overheard his grandfather say.
Will would be relieved, of course, to learn that the boy’s hostility was not directed at him personally.
But, like her, he would be upset at the thought of what the poor boy had been going through.
She had just cleared away the last of the cooking things when she heard the back door open.
Minutes later Will’s black and white collie came padding into the kitchen and settled himself down on the rug with a long sigh.
“Something smells good,” Will said as he came in.
“A lamb casserole,” Paloma replied. “It’s ready whenever you are. Any news on the cattle?”
“Yes. They were found wandering loose on the moor. Someone managed to herd them into a field and I’ve just been down to collect them.”
“That’s good news. Do you know how they got out?” Paloma asked.
“The gate was left wide open so it looks like it was deliberate. I can only think it was someone’s idea of a joke.”
“Well, they’re back safely. That’s the main thing.”
“Indeed. So how has Finn been today? I heard the television on when I came in and poked my head round to say hello, but he was engrossed.”
Paloma took a deep breath.
“He told me something today, Will. Something I think you should know. It explains such a lot.”
Will frowned.
“Sounds very mysterious. Go on.”
“He thinks he’s responsible for his grandmother’s illness.”
Will frowned.
“Why on earth would he think that?”
Paloma told him how Finn had overheard his grandfather saying to his wife that he thought Finn was too much for her, and how Finn had convinced himself that her illness was his fault.
“The poor boy thought it was because he’d been making too much noise.
“And he said something else as well.” She paused, aware that Will was staring down at his tightly clasped hands.
“Go on,” he said.
“He said he’s been as quiet as he can around you because he doesn’t want to be sent away again.”
When Will looked up, Paloma saw his eyes were shimmering with tears.
“How could he think that?” he whispered, shaking his head. “I’m a rubbish dad. I should
have . . . If only I’d said something.”
“Don’t, Will.” She was so moved to pity at the sight of his distress that she took a step towards him and took his hand in hers. “You couldn’t have known.”
“But he told you. Not me.”
“It’s sometimes easier to talk to a stranger about things. You’re a great dad. And you’re so patient with him.”
“I want to be, Paloma.” Will drew a deep shaky breath and held on to her hand like a drowning man clutching at a lifebelt. “I really want to be.
“I’ve missed him so much. I have missed so many of his milestones as he grew up.
“I lost my wife and my child in one fell swoop.
“Don’t get me wrong. I’m very grateful to the in-laws for stepping in the way they did,” Will added.
“They’ve been brilliant. But it was only meant to be while I got things sorted at the farm so that I could have more time for Finn.
“It broke my heart.”
“Well, he’s home now,” Paloma said softly, aware that Will was still holding her hand.
“I think he’ll settle once you have that talk to him.”
“When did you get to be so wise?” Will’s eyes were still shining with unshed tears as he looked down at her.
Her face was just inches away from his. Paloma forgot to breathe.
Then, somehow, his lips were on hers. A soft, gentle kiss that dissolved her bones.
She moved closer to him and that tiny movement broke the spell.
He pulled away, his eyes full of remorse.
“I’m so sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have done that. Please forgive me.”
“You have nothing to apologise for.” Her cheeks burned as she began to gather up her belongings. “I’ll get my things and I’ll be off. Don’t forget the lamb casserole.”
How could she have done that? It would look to him as if she’d taken advantage of his distress by pushing herself on him.
What must he think of her?
She picked up her coat and hurried to the door.
“Say goodbye to Finn for me, will you?” she said. “I must dash.”
With that, she hurried out without looking at him.
She’d always believed that romance had passed her by, that there was something about her that put men off.
Her brother Edmund had told her that often enough.
And now, for the first time in her life, she’d fallen in love – with a man who was still in love with his dead wife.
She let herself back into the flat with a heavy heart.
She loved living here and loved being with Finn.
But there was no way she could stay at Moor View Farm.